COMMUNICATION

I used to read constantly, with at least 3 or 4 books a week finished each week.  Lately, I have gone in spurts.  I am getting very picky about what I read.  With the internet giving me so much available, a book has to reach out and grab me.  I have read 2 of those in the past week.

I love true and fictional history, always coming away having learned something.  Last week's topic was slavery, but this week began with a book about a child with Asperbergers Syndrome.  I wasn't sure I wanted to read it, but the author's name drew me in.  I learned more about myself and others than I did about autism.

As I read about this teen with an IQ of 152, who could not stand unexpected noise or changes in his world, I began to empathize.  He explained how his heart began to race and how filled with anxiety he became.  I feel the same way every time Catie has her friends in the house!    He explained how texture affected his mood and sense of well being.  Is it not the same when I walk into a shop filled with yarn and must fondle  each skein and soak up the colors?  Or is it so different when he must feel order in his life, as I stress about the latest mess left behind?

The more I read, the more I became convinced that I had felt exactly like this boy so many times.  I just have a greater ability to control my response.   All people become uncomfortable about SOME things in their life.  We just all have our own ways of protesting what makes us feel stressed.  I read about autistic children having "meltdowns" when they are overwhelmed and thought about how I deal with those same feelings.  Sometimes I just have to retreat and make all the activity stop for a while to find my inner peace.

Life has become so filled with noise.  We are bombarded with so much stimuli in our lives today.  The media, gives us news traveling the world in real time.  We know so much, that it is at times, too much.  Our senses become overwhelmed.   We are so busy that we are too busy to enjoy silence.  We can't even find silence.

We no longer stop for an idle conversation with a neighbor, but send them an email instead.  The cell phones we carry ring constantly, keeping us from even the peaceful moments while driving or shopping.  I quietly listen to the conversations of my children and grandchildren and realize how different their world is from the one I grew up in.  Is it better?  In many ways, I think not.   They sit in class posting comments to the internet on their Ipods, more involved in their social lives than what is going on in the classroom.  What will they truly take from their high school years?

They come home to cable TV shows that depict lives that for most, they will never experience, where language is foul and there are few boundaries.    I compare it with the shows I grew up with,  like "Father Knows Best" and "Lassie", where normal families lived just like I did.  I watched them with my grandparents and no one worried if the content was going to be shocking.

 We all go to our laptops where the world is waiting and receive instant responses, often from strangers.  I wonder how it will affect their communication skills in real relationships.  I admit to experiencing the "high" of playing video games that seem to reach out and grab you until you realize you have wasted hours of time in search of the thrill of "winning".   However, I didn't win because I am really not playing with anyone but myself.

In my mid fifties, I think back to my grandmother sitting at her kitchen table quietly writing her letters each and every day from her quiet vacation cottage. (Photo at right)  She kept in touch with everyone all summer with an old fashioned letter.  The 2 or 3 TV channels that were available kept her informed of the local news every night after dinner and the rest of the time was spent gazing at the lake, visiting friends and enjoying family.  Her life was so very peaceful.    We have come a long way, but I am not sure it was in the right direction.