Missing My Dad

It has been 17 years since my Dad passed away and I realize I talk about him every day. If only I could be such a parent, to have that kind of impact.

Every situation that arises, somehow I hear his voice in my head. There is always a "Gordyism" to fit the problem. Some are pretty funny, others are just bits of advice. Every childhood memory is filled with Dad. I realize one thing. He made his kids believe that there was NOTHING that they could not accomplish!

We were taught life was going to be hard work, but hard work was just a new challenge. Challenge was a good thing. It made your heart beat faster and you knew you were alive!
You also knew you were going to win.

When things didn't turn out so well, it was only another opportunity for a Gordyism. "If life hands you a lemon, make lemonade", then he helped you figure out how to do that. He never gave you the answer, but taught you how to think.

We were "little people" with most of the family falling between 4'10 and 5'5" tall.
"The bigger they are the harder they fall, Pal!" I can hear him say it over and over. If it was going to be a tough fight, he might say "They may end up with dinner, but you had better get LUNCH."

Every challenge had a planning stage. Selling Girl Scout cookies began with a talk with Dad. It went something like this:

"How many do you have to sell to be the top salesgirl?"
"How many days do you have to do this?"
"Who could be your customers?"
"Let's plan what you will say...."

No wonder Dave and I both ended up in sales! And yes, I was always the top salesgirl. In Cub Scouts, Dave sold so much fertilizer that they delivered in via semi-truck. Mom almost fainted when they filled our entire driveway with those big bags. Dad helped him deliver every bag.

Memories of boxing with Dad on the front lawn (boxing gloves and all) by the age of 5 or 6 are floating around in my head today. He taught me how to defend myself, but there was more learned there as he taught me to think fast and defensively. I was afraid of no one.

More memories of special "secret" trips that ended up at places like the Magic Drinking Fountain are like treasures to pull out on a bad day. After a full day of just time together, we would arrive at the Fountain and he would tell me about the people who believed that this water was so "special" and we were going to get a drink of it. I can still taste that cold well water. I drove by it the other day when I was in Northville and my heart ached for Dad.

He taught me the value of imagination and time spent, just experiencing a beautiful fall day with your Dad. The Michigan State Fair that became a tradition to look forward to as he made every display, event and ride seem like a miracle......I love to watch the home movies of learning how to fish in the lakes up north after he built the anticipation for weeks for our summer vacation.

We knew summer meant a week "up north" at the cottage. Maybe that is why I long for a cottage so much. Those memories of lazy mornings waking to the sound of the lake lapping on the shore, the sight of Lake Huron first thing in the morning. The evenings of sitting on the dock with Dad fishing for perch. Of course, while we fished he talked to me.

I didn't realize I was learning how to live. It might come in the form of a "Jenny" story. I am thankful that my kids got to hear Jenny stories. "Jenny" was a little girl that my father created to teach values. He made up the most wonderful stories about her and one day I figured out she always taught you some kind of moral, ethic or value. Amazing man he was.

"Jenny" was poor because her father, Joe, was "down on his luck". She was good and kind and knew what really mattered. So did her father Joe. I listened to stories of Joe always finding a way to take care of Jenny. Jenny and Joe always found a way to do for others and always did the "right" thing. Wow!

Sometimes Joe went to the bar for a beer. Then we could role play it! I got to be "Joe" and he was the bartender. We had some GREAT conversations as we worked out Joe's problems. I had a miniature A & W Root Beer mug for my "beer", he had a REAL one, of course.

He taught me the value of being spontaneous. Some rules and schedules have to be followed and sometimes you just have to do, what you NEED for you. He never missed a day of work in his life, unless he was on vacation and he knew how to have a vacation, at a moment's notice.

It is OK to do something just because you want to! Some vacations could be planned in about 3 minutes. He got up, got the urge and hours later we were either on the road or on a plane! Talk about IMPULSIVE! He taught us how to be impulsive without being reckless. Dave and I are known for it, but we come by it naturally.

If it was a rough work week....Friday morning, take the day off, tell the kids to stay home from school and head for the airport....be in Chicago by 3. Live it up! Order room service and eat just olives, if that is what you want.....experience something new.
Sure makes Monday morning easier after a crazy, fun, weekend.

There are so many memories, that I could write a book about Dad. Maybe I will. Today, I just miss him real bad.